I needed a haircut this week. It was mid July when I last got a trim, and even though there was nothing special on my calendar (where I’d need to look good or better than normal), I just knew it was time.
Generally a committed customer to the products and services I pay for, I have been buying shampoo, conditioner and bodywash from Usana for 10 years. I go to Healthy Planet for my vitamins, and I always get gas from Esso.
I am loyal to what I like, and I often refer people to my favorites. Maybe I’ve already referred you to someone or something in the past?
After the lockdown I decided not to go downtown for my hair services any more (I’d been going to the same person for several years) so I searched Google for a new hair stylist closer to home.
I didn’t get a referral and that was probably my big mistake.
I didn’t like the vibe, the salon, or the cut and I knew I wouldn’t go back.
Then my friend Aline told me about a hair salon she’s gone to recently near the Danforth, and she loved the stylist.
It’s great to hear referrals like this, isn’t it?
In our current environment, it’s so important to ask loved ones, friends and acquaintances for referrals for business and personal services. Referrals are so important in building long standing successful relationships, especially when it’s something important (like a good haircut!)
And sometimes we need a little help from our friends.
I booked myself an appointment with the stylist on the Danforth. There was one available right over the lunch hour, so off I went.
Aline was right. The hairdresser was amazing. She did an excellent job of cutting and styling my hair, and I’m looking forward to going back. Of course, we chatted and I discovered we had lots in common. I can see why my friend was drawn to her.
It’s so important to trust your intuition when you are making decisions. And that includes getting help from others. Next time you’re looking for a business service or even advice, turn to your friends and ask them who they’ve hired and had success with. You’ll be amazed at the treasures you’ll uncover. And don’t be afraid to share who you love to do business with, with others. I am a huge connector, and I know many people in many different areas of business and I love to give referrals.
My business is built on trust, integrity and personal experience with me. That’s why most of my clients come from referrals. The unique approach of blending spirituality with professional coaching and channeling is a one of a kind service that’s exclusive, unparalleled and transformational for the right person.
If you, or someone you know seems stuck, confused or unhappy, maybe you or they, need someone to help them. Go to my intake form and let’s have an initial conversation to see if we are a fit. It’s no cost for the initial consultation.
This year I turned off social media because all those happy Father’s Day pictures are a grim reminder.
A reminder that days like yesterday, and Mother’s Day, are not always happy ones if you got the short straw in the parental love department.
In all my years of personal growth work, I know days like yesterday’s Father’s Day, other family celebrations and annual traditions are the worst for those of us who come from dysfunctional families.
It’s often a major trigger.
We all have our ways to cope.
Some of us do what’s “expected”. We place the calls or make the visits. Send the cards and buy the gifts. We keep up the pretense.
And for those of us who can’t.
We choose to remove ourselves and become estranged. We have no contact and pretend we are okay.
It’s safer this way.
And when we are alone with our thoughts we feel the pain, and then dismiss it.
My therapist told me once “Gail, you’ll never get over it. You can never really accept that you didn’t get the mom or dad you deserved, and you will always wish they could have been the parents you really wanted. That’s why you have to do the work“.
So I did. I did it for years.
Inner child healing. Re-parenting. Nurturing the child within.
And now it doesn’t hurt. So much.
There are others who are the lucky ones. They don’t know it.They won the jackpot.
You can’t know you are blessed when you’re used to being loved unconditionally, and treated right. When you can have your own opinions and identity and make our own choices without blame and shame. When you don’t experience criticism, control and constant critique.
Those of us who didn’t get that often got much worse.
Beatings and put downs. Sexual abuse. Too much responsibility. Lost childhoods. Heavy expectations. Lack of love.
Healing the inner child is hard any day of the week.
But it’s especially hard on Mother’s Day and Father’s Day.
But it’s not impossible.
You need to figure out what you didn’t get, and give it to yourself.
It’s called Radical Self Love!
So if you were one of the lucky ones, great. I’m happy for you. I probably saw your pictures on Facebook, briefly.
But if you weren’t, and you’d like to move on from your pain, reach out to me.
Inner Child Healing … It’s one of my coaching specialties. Because when you’re on the other side of it like I am, you know how to support others.
Don’t wait for next year.
None of my clients have ever said “I wished I’d waited to do this work”. They are all glad they did it. And have no regrets. Ever.
Freedom will make you feel that good.
If you’re ready let’s chat. Call or text me today!
How do you stand out?
Energetically this is a very unique time for our world. We are going through a lot of turmoil and change and it is affecting all of us. Our planet and species is evolving faster than ever before, and our level of consciousness is rising to cope with the changes. And as much as we are all very similar, each and every one of is having a truly unique experience. We think we know who others are, yet we really have no idea what it’s like to walk in each other’s shoes, especially in these turbulent times.
Try this next time you’re at work, walking in the mall, at the grocery store …
Look at others and ask yourself …
“I wonder who they really are?”
“I wonder what’s going on for them?”
“I wonder what it’s like to be them?”
“I wonder what keeps them up at night?”
“I wonder what makes them laugh?”
The questions are not there to be answered, just to ponder and realize that we are all unique.
Drop judgment and be interested. Most people would rather crawl under a rock than be someone who stands out. But, don’t be like everyone else. Be different!
1. Acknowledge YOUR uniqueness!
Seriously, you don’t want to be like anyone else. Your body is different. Your brain is different. Your life experiences are different. Wow!!! Isn’t that amazing? Honor and respect who you are, quirks and all.
“Don’t try so hard to FIT IN when you were BORN to stand out!”
2. Don’t try to be like everyone else!
I know in our society, it is often uncomfortable to be different. Let go of the peanut gallery who wants you to be like them. You are NOT like everyone else in so many ways. Go over your life and feel gratitude for all the unique experiences you have had … even if they felt good, or not. Don’t judge. And love yourself just a little bit more.
“Don’t try so hard to FIT IN when you were BORN to stand out!”
3. Find love and acceptance for others!
Seriously, most people really only want love and acceptance. They are unique too, just like you, and they too are afraid to stand out. But why fight it! Be yourself, and let others do the same!
Notice when you’re wanting to be like everyone else and instead, focus on what makes you feel FABULOUS and find more of that in your life.
Every day, find one thing to tell yourself that has you feel YOU WERE BORN TO STAND OUT!!!
If this makes you feel uncomfortable … GOOD. It means you are GROWING!!!
Here’s something I do … I know it’s not for everyone but it sure makes me stand out. When I order coffee, a meal or make a reservation and the server asks my name, I use a completely different one! I say ROCK STAR!
Now what are you waiting for?
Time is ticking … you ROCK STAR!!!